They can be really difficult even though in books and movies they get romanticised a lot – writing of love letters and late night phone calls, which of course can be one side of it, but then there’s the endless wanting of being with the other person right there next to you and the feeling of despair because there’s nothing you can do about it (unless they live somewhere you can get by a car or bus which is easier than having to travel by plane).
That’s why it’s important to plan when you’re going to meet next in the future so that there’s a set date you can look forward to. And of course in the meantime always communicate by texts/Skype/letters/phone calls – there’s nothing worse than the uncertainty of whether the other person still feels the same about you which can creep up on you kind of easily if you don’t talk regularly or if you don’t see them in a long time. Long distance relationships especially require a lot of trust which is definitely going to get tested.
A few tips on how to make a relationship work when you’re not able to meet very often:
- Be patient, it won’t help if you get upset about the situation every day. Instead try to think about how quickly the date of your next meeting will come and about how amazing it will be to see them again.
- Have pictures of the other person and the two of you together to remind you that it’s worth it to wait.
- Plan something fun for when you’re together so that when you do finally get to be with them you will make great memories.
- Recommend each other your favourite books, movies, music etc. which will make you feel like the other person is there with you while you watch, read or listen to it.
- Be honest about your feelings, remember that they can’t read your mind – we often assume that other people know how we feel when we’re indirect, and it’s even worse when you’re not with them in person. Honesty will prevent confusion and disappointment.
If you really love them then even the long distance will not matter and everything will be worth the wait. It will help if you’ll work on eventually moving to the same country or city, that should be the goal I guess. In the meatime just be patient and still enjoy every minute of it, they say that “looking forward to things is half the pleasure of them” (L. M. Montgomery).
Have you ever been in a long distance relationship? How difficult did you find it and what helped you along the way? 🙂